Finding out you did not get the job can be disappointing, especially if it was a position you really wanted. The news can be even more disheartening if you’ve been looking for a job for a long time and received several rejections.

Most people will tell you to “accept it and move on,” which is the right thing but much easier said than done. Here are some thoughts and suggestions that might help you through this difficult phase:

Analyze your interview performance

Try to obtain constructive feedback from the interviewer if you can. For example, not long ago, in response to a candidate asking, I told her that she might consider relying on her notes sparingly as she came across as scripted and not spontaneous. She appreciated that feedback and said she would adapt in future interviews.

Often, an employer will not provide feedback, but you should still do a self-analysis to determine if there is anything about your answers, dress, impression, or questions that you could have done differently.

But don’t eliminate the possibility that you might have done everything perfectly and that there was a better-qualified candidate who got the job.

Do not react negatively

When someone does provide feedback, even if you disagree, always accept the information with an open mind. Thank the person for providing it, and never react angrily or start to argue. They will not change their mind and you will appear immature and unprofessional.

Here is an example of an appropriate email I received from a candidate after advising her she was not getting the job.

Dear Gerry,

I really appreciate your call and the feedback you provided me. While I was disappointed that I was not selected, I am confident the company has chosen the right candidate for the job. Please keep my resume on file in case you find a good match for me in the future. It was a pleasure meeting you.

[Name withheld]

Express gratitude for the opportunity

Always thank the employer for their time and consideration. This shows professionalism and leaves a positive last impression. You might say something like:

Thank you for taking the time to interview me and for considering me for this position. I appreciate the opportunity to learn more about your company and the role.

Ask about future opportunities

If you’re still interested in working for the company, express your continued interest and ask to be considered for future positions. This keeps the door open for potential opportunities down the line.

Network with the interviewer

If you make a positive impression on the interviewer, even if you didn’t get the job, they might be able to help you with your job search. Connect with them on social media and stay in touch via the occasional email. Who knows? Maybe the person they hired will not work out, or perhaps another opening will arise.

Use the experience to refine your job search strategy

Consider what you’ve learned from this experience and how to apply it to your job search. Maybe you need to target different types of roles, improve specific skills, or adjust your interview preparation strategy.

Accept it and move on

Don’t carry interview baggage with you. It will paralyze you and prevent you from being at the top of your game in future interviews.

Instead, keep your momentum going by approaching new opportunities with enthusiasm and rigour.

Remember, rejection is a normal part of the job search process. By handling it gracefully and professionally, you maintain your reputation and open doors for future opportunities. Stay positive, keep improving, and your persistence will eventually pay off.